The new “Vader” bullet-proof outfit keeps rogue face-shooters like Dick Cheney (left) shooting at birds; not you. (Click it.)
PUKWANA SD — This time of year a lot of white men are out in the fields shooting each other— accidentally— and occasionally on purpose. John Derrick “Lucky” Shawtt, a Colorado outfitter who has made a small fortune selling bullet-proof fashion to presidents, oligarchs, celebrities, criminals, and assorted politicians, is marketing a new line of stylish bullet-proof outfits. The “Vader” is clearly inspired by Vice President Dick Cheney’s now-famous shooting accident. Says Lucky:
“This is a head shot market for us. Dick ‘Darth’ Cheney single-handedly raised awareness of hunting ‘accidents.’ Our stylish “Vader” outfit is not only bullet-proof, it puts other hunters on notice that there could be dire consequences from the dark side.”
Hmm. Did we mention it was “stylish”? Available in “Safety Orange.” ‘Nuff said.
*
