“You are going to be so tired of winning.”
—Donald Trump
TEEVEE LAND, WASHINGTON D.C. — Murderous rat and fictional television President, Francis Underwood, exists in a world of make-believe, fake news, and lies. Or does he. “Power is a lot like real estate,” says Frank. “It’s all about location, location, location; the closer you are to the source, the higher your property value.” More on powerful real estate in a bit.
In the Netflix Original Series HOUSE of CARDS, Frank and Claire Underwood and Team Underwood wield power in sixty-five carefully crafted episodes spanning five seasons, and they do it with the kind of ruthless teevee amorality TRUMP’merikan© zombies have come to expect from their mostly elected leaders. But if you binged-watched season five, then you’re all done with their political intrigues for another year.
Yeah; fuck that, in the twenty-first century after Christ, entertainment is a daily must-have experience.
So real Americans binge watch the nation’s hottest new series, HOUSE OF TURDS, airing 24/7 on at least three news networks— and there have already been more than 135 unforgettable episodes! What’s more, there are exciting new episodes every freakin’ day of the week, with bombshell after bombshell events. Now that’s some real reality television for yooz TRUMP’merikans© who wanted to “shake things up.”
You’ll remember last year — yeah, just last year — there was a lot of media rubber-lipping about Trump starting a propaganda news channel after he lost the election. . . (assuming he’s not locked up). . . Weh – heh – hell. It sure as shit seems like he has co-opted some endless coverage on all three news channels, and, he’s making someone else pay. NO, not Mexico, dumbass. All of US.
“The road to power is paved with hypocrisy, and casualties.”
—Francis Underwood
But back to Frank’s real estate metaphor. Some people say President Trump knows something about real estate, too, even international real estate. And thanks to an increasingly clear confluence of events and forces beyond our meager teevee land knowing, he has laid claim to the most sought after real estate in our entire nation, the White House.
“Democracy is highly overrated.”
—Frank Underwood —Donald Trump
“I think I can’t do much better, right?”
—Donald Trump
The question so many Americans have about that particular acquisition is, just how did he actually swing that deal?
Well. If you want the answer to that question and a hundred more, you are going to have to keep both eyes on HOUSE of TURDS. And watch your back while you’re at it.
