BullShit Runner

I would run after some half-baked Alaska groan grown Iditarod donuts and seal sausage.

I’m not a subscriber to BullShit Runner Magazine. It’s too expensive. But I did manage to snag this copy from the unisex restroom at Running Rogue, a new theme running equipment store that just opened at the end of Columbia Center Mall in Kennewick next to the Lids store.  I was in Kennewick to sample the Friday night seafood buffet at the Crow’s Nest, detailed here. . .

Obligatory time-loss warning: you will never get this 1:41 back.

You probably noticed the deteriorating camera work at the end of the clip; the drinks are strong at the Nest.  But. I’m straying from my topic:  BullShit Runner.  It’s the first magazine I’ve ever seen devoted to the strange combo of running for health and running for office, but not really either one.  It was pure coinky-dinkyness that I was in the tri-city area the same weekend Sarah Palin flew in from her Going Rogue bus tour to visit friends and run the Kennewick Turkey Trot 5k.  Or some of it.  Like so many other things in Sarah Palin’s “American Life,” she found a good reason to quit before crossing the finish line.  HufPo said she quit to avoid a “mass of fans” waiting for her at the finish line; police officer Michelle Pitts said Palin quit early so that “the family could get to their Thanksgiving dinner.”  We report.  You decide.

Palin told reporters and various hangers-on that it was good to be back in the Tri-Cities to reconnect with “the roots.”  Ironically, like Sarah, the “roots” of the Tri-Cities, although intertwined, have always struggled with their identity, too.  And well, counting.  The tri-cities are really four cities, but some people don’t like the sound of “Quad-Cities.” Lately, some folks have taken to calling the area “Three Rivers,” after the Columbia, Yakima, and Snake rivers, that confluence at Kennewick. This is probably a good place to remind you that Sarah says, “Only dead fish go with the flow.”  Jussst sayin’.

Palin stayed in Richmond, one of the four cities that, if considered together— as residents often will point out during the seafood buffet at the Crow’s Nest as they thoughtlessly shovel the last few shrimp out of the steam tray and hand you the spoon— would form the fourth largest city in Washington state, after Seattle, Spokane, and Takoma. If— you lump’em together.  Yes; there’s a cold undercurrent of socialistic languor around the notion, and local Palinistas, apparently enervated by Sarah’s failure to finish the Turkey Trot, are becoming increasingly outspoken about keeping the identities of the cities separate;  even in the face of the mounting difficulty of competing against each other for business, tourism, and an identity of their own.

But there I go again. Bullshit.  I can’t seem to stay focused on the stories, and I haven’t actually finished any of them yet;  I’m thinking I’ll quit reading them so I can get back to some left-over roast turkey.  Which is actually roast pork.  I may try some with those “wolf waffles,” if I can finish the recipe.  Or maybe I’ll just watch this last video again, or maybe just the first six minutes.  Is Sarah a runner?  You’re guess is as good as mine.  Will she run for the presidency?  Maybe.  Sorta.  In a way.  But let’s ask these people below.  I have to go finish something.  Anything.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mKKKgua7wQk&feature=player_embedded#[/youtube]
“When you’re right, you don’t have’ta compromise; compromise is for people that are wrong.”